Today

I've got two keyboard lessons this morning, and I'm really looking forward to them as usual. Unusually I'm not eating with my friends today, as I will be cooking for my visitor. I will miss that.

Sleep

I went to bed at 1am and was awake at 5.45am. I had one of those nights where I'm not sure if I was asleep or awake. I feel mentally exhausted.

This morning

I feel a bit jaded but very cheerful. My friend and I were up early. I do find early morning conversation very difficult, but it's lovely to have someone around. We had a traditional English breakfast of strong coffee and fags. I'll cook something when I get back.

Yesterday

Yesterday began with strong coffee, fags, and a hearty fry-up. I haven't cooked a fry-up for ages. We went for a walk along the coast. I was delighted to find Sweet Scabious growing, as it's the first time I've ever seen it. Afterwards we were very English with our Darjeeling tea and fig rolls. After that we went for a paddle. My friend went to the pub while I cooked a very successful chicken dinner. Unusually we spent the remainder of the evening at the pub. Lovely!

Saturday night

My friend from Germany arrived on time, and we met him at the station. We had dinner at my place before sauntering down to the pub. There were such a lot of nice people there. My friend and I ended up nattering until 3am. It was a lovely night.

Disappointed

On the way to the library, I had so many things I wanted to say. I am feeling so stressed with all the noise and shitty behaviour I think I'll go for a walk instead, before I really lose my temper.

Offspring

If these little bastards are anything like their parents, it is truly alarming.

Perhaps

You can stick a gibbon in a frock if you like, but you can't alter the fact it's still a gibbon.

Shortly

I need to pop back to the supermarket to get a couple of things I forgot earlier. I might get into the habit of making a list one of these days.

I wish

I'd really like a harpoon gun at the moment.

Mundane

I'm well on the way to making my place presentable for when my friend arrives. The front room looks lovely.

More about Aspergers

I just found this picture online. My meltdowns are always triggered by sound. I'm finding it hard not to explode at the pack of animals in the library.

Culture shock

There's a bunch of nomadic children in the library, shouting, hitting each other and generally behaving like a pack of savages. They are cunts.

Ironic

Yesterday someone asked me to play 'Silence is golden'. It reminded me of the cunt who never stops talking. Luckily he didn't stay for very long yesterday.

The weather

It's cool and humid, but beginning to warm up. It did this yesterday, and from lunchtime onwards the weather was glorious. I hope it does the same today.

Very silly

Highly comical.

Sleep

I had planned on having a supper of frozen chips with grated cheese. However I got home at nearly 2am, so went straight to bed. I only remember waking up once or twice, and got up at 10am this morning.

Soon

In a moment I'm going round to collect my keyboard from my friends'. Afterwards it's housework, baking bread and cooking dinner. (And of course shopping). I'm going to be busy.

Ein Besuch

Heute Abend kommt die koenigliche Wuppertaler Botschaft an. Ich freue Mich schon.

A musical interlude

The session at the pub was a resounding success. It remained busy until closing time, and there was enthusiastic singing throughout. Apart from the regulars, there were some people who came on the recommendation of others. Two young punks who come to my events brought a group of friends with them. A man who works in broadcasting was surprised, as he'd seen me once before, but I was playing classical music then. People said such kind and encouraging things about the night. I am full of cheerfulness this morning, and the hangover isn't too severe!

Yesterday evening and night

I went to the pub after the party, and had a pint while sorting out the song-sheets. When I arrived, my friend from uni's brother was there with his son. It was a nice evening and night, with plenty of friends putting in an appearance.

Yesterday afternoon

The birthday party was lovely, and the singalong was a great success. After dinner I asked the birthday boy if he'd like a go on my keyboard. Initially he hesitated, saying that he'd never touched a musical instrument before. I popped out for a fag, and when I came back he was playing a tune with both hands in parallel octaves. What's more, his hands were in the right position and the fingers were used correctly. He enjoys the classical pieces that I play, and I think he's more than capable of it. We'll start lessons on Monday.

Now

I've been so involved in thought that I forgot to go home for a nap. I'm going to put that right now.

The Olympics

Medical history

Cricket

More football

Tomorrow

I'm really looking forward to the arrival of my friend from Germany tomorrow night. I don't suppose it will be very long before we find ourselves at the pub.

A result!

I've just come back from the charity shop with a few old songs that I can use at the pub. It was worth the visit.

Football (again)

A face one can trust?

Beekeepers have hit out at David Cameron, the Prime Minister, for falsely claiming to be life patron of a beekeeping club and failing to ban pesticides blamed for killing the pollinators.

Boring

Now that the English team is out of the world cup, the BBC start bombarding us with tennis. Have they no imagination at all? Typical programming schedule: BBC1 Football, soap operas & reality tv shows; BBC2 Tennis (except when either football or tennis is shown on both channels simultaneously). And they charge a licence fee to pay for this shite.

Soon

I am about to wander down the High Street, where I understand a charity shop has lots of sheet music. I cant wait to see it.

Outrageous

I've just seen the news that a famous footballer has been suspended for nine matches, and banned from football for four months. Perhaps I'm just being plain stupid, but I need to pose a question: Isn't biting someone a criminal offence? Disgraceful.

Dulcet tones

While I was having my coffee and fags, and contemplating the world, my peace was interrupted by the downstairs neighbours. I could hear her shouting like a screech owl, and screaming Slavic obscenities at someone else. People can be such a joy.

The weather

Last night was very mild, but it rained quite a bit. It was warm summer rain, so it was very pleasant. It still feels humid this morning, but it's getting warm. Perhaps we'll have some more rain.

Sleep

I woke up a few times during the night, before finally getting up at 6.30am. I do feel tired, so I'll try and have a nap when I get home.

A musical interlude

I'm playing for another birthday party this afternoon. It's the twelfth birthday of the brother of the boy I played for recently. I am really delighted that he has asked me to play. Tonight I'm playing my Friday night slot at the pub, and I'm looking forward to that too.

Last night

I went to the pub after a very simple but substantial dinner. It was very quiet, but some friends turned up just after I arrived. We sat together outside. Later on I played scrabble with the landlord. I didn't enjoy it much, because I won by too many points. Winning or losing by a huge margin is boring.

More about football

The best in the world?

That is what I was taught about British television. I feel really sorry for those poor countries who have to watch programmes even more unengaging and mediocre than ours. I threw away my aerial lead, thereby escaping from the endless sports programmes, and the misnamed 'news' bulletins, half of which were occupied by sports. I like being without television programmes.

Wrong prorities

Why are entertainers and sports/games players so overpaid, when healthcare workers are underpaid for what they do? Why is there money to sponsor sport, when old people die of cold in the winter? We have money for Olympic Games, but not for schools. We are living under an austerity government, but sport isn't affected. It's all quite obscene really.

Sports

Why do we say 'sport' when what we're actually talking about is a 'game'? A game is something which is played, i.e. is not serious. If it is not serious, then, why do people take games so seriously? I say 'serious', when 'hysterical' or 'manic' might be more appropriate words. I wish that people could be just as excitable about important matters. I don't understand.

Overpaid

Shameful behaviour from someone who is overpaid.

Food

I have been eating significantly more since last Tuesday. I also feel hungry quite often. Before Tuesday I didn't usually feel hungry, but would make my dinner because I knew I had to.

Strange

This moron sat next to me is watching what looks like random attacks on people on the computer. YUGH.

Finally

I saw my friendly tobacconist yesterday at last, so I've got enough tobacco to keep me going.

The weather

After yesterday's unpromising start, it brightened up, and has remained beautiful since yesterday lunchtime. I don't feel like staying indoors when it's like this, so I went and did a bit more painting.

This morning

I finally sorted out my prescription, so at least that's something I don't need to think about. The scary thing is that the hag at the doctor's knows my name now.

Yesterday

I painted a bit more during the afternoon, stayed for a pint, then went home for my dinner. Afterwards I returned to the pub and spent the whole time with friends. It was a lovely evening.

A prima donna

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7kS68T6ptA

Another precious tennis player.

Tennis

http://www.tennistv.com/

I recommend this

More football fun

Football fun

More football

Not what you think.

Football

Life

How different my life is to when I lived in London. One of my Facebook friends has invited me to a party in Berlin. I wouldn't cope very well with the crowd, but it is so nice to be invited.

Tired

I feel suddenly very tired. I'll try and have a nap shortly.

Now

I'm feeling quite edgy, after yesterday's waste of time and energy. I've done nothing but wonder if my doctor and the hospital have managed to communicate yet.

How I feel

This is one of the reasons I threw away my aerial lead.

IQ

Quite so

Words of wisdom

Weather

We had a brief shower early in the evening, but the night continued warm and humid. It's much cooler and darker today, and it looks like we're in for a lot of rain. It doesn't look good, because I'm wearing a t-shirt, shorts and sandals.

More about Aspergers

The brain has been in overdrive all morning. Earlier I thought about my friend's forthcoming visit, and how in just over a week's time, it will all be in the past. My brain then went into German: Die heutige Zukunft ist die morgige Vergangenheit'. That's what my mind often does when I think. I dart in and out of whatever language.

Different

Since last Tuesday, my appetite is much more like it used to be. I enjoy my food, so eat everything on the plate. I also feel hungry more often. That's probably a good thing, but I don't want to get fat.

Hmmm...

Last night

I was in the company of someone who is really quite acceptable when he's quiet. However he's hardly ever quiet, and when he's not, he's a cunt.

Misgivings

I'm supposed to collect my prescription today. I've got another dose left, so I'll collect it tomorrow. I don't think I can face that miserable hag of a receptionist just yet.

Waterloo Station

The above two words are highly evocative of the atmosphere in the library at present. Another two woprds might be 'noisy' and 'distracting'.

Later on

After I've finished painting, I'll come home for dinner. I'm going to dress as dapper as I can manage, and meet another friend from London at the pub. I think today will be nice.

This afternoon

I'm going back to the pub, but not for cider on this occasion. I'm going to help give a second coat of paint to the ladies' lavatories.

Last night

After a simple but satisfying plate of sausages, beans and mash, I went to the pub. Three of us made quite a decent job of painting the ladies' lavatories, which is the bigger of the two. Afterwards we had a pint or two. I enjoyed it.

Lately

I've been feeling very lazy for the past week. I don't exactly feel tired at the moment, but I'm not rearing to go either. I feel unusually laid-back. One thing I am really looking forward to, though, is the arrival of my friend from Germany on Saturday.

Food

I've just had a massive doorstep of a sandwich for lunch. I couldn't possibly eat another thing, yet here am I thinking about my dinner.

Elegant intercourse?

A woman is gabbing away on her mobile. I suppose I have no right to complain. After all, this is the library, and I'm a grumpy old git.

More about Aspergers

My brain in in overdrive. It's such a miscellaneous, contradictory and random collection of thoughts. It feels like a load of debris flying around, and is starting to give me a headache.

This afternoon

The weather is glorious. Shortly I'll go home via the supermarket, and then go to see a friend who has just returned from her holiday.

Good as new?

A while ago we were going to paint the toilets near the pub, but it hasn't happened yet. The loos are currently in a deplorable state of maintenance. Well we're starting tonight. That should be fun!

Bump

Since my last fit I feel different in myself. I feel the urge to dress smartly, and I have a healthy appetite. I feel more cheerful. Did I knock some sense into myself when I banged my head?

Last night

I went very late to the pub. It was completely bereft of friends, in fact it was unusually quiet. I had a nice game of scrabble with the landlord. The only thing I didn't enjoy was winning by so many points.

Yesterday teatime

The lesson went very well, as usual, and it's obvious how much we both enjoy it. Afterwards I had a lovely meal with my people, and a good natter. Because the weather was so lovely, I walked the long way home via the seafront. I heard some people calling my name; it was my friend from uni's brother and day. I joined them for a nice glass of wine, and we were joined afterwards by the brother's partner. What a good life.

Bewildered, of Grimethorpe

I saw the doctor yesterday and told him about my latest fit. He gave me the same, unnecessary tests and told me that nothing was showing up. (I could have told him not to bother). He suspects I have epilepsy and told me to phone the neurology secretary to chase my appointment. (I had already told the doctor that I am very uncomfortable using phones). I walked up to the hospital today and spoke to the neurology secretary. She told me they had no record of me, and that I should chase my GP for a referral letter. I walked down to my GP and asked to speak to the doctor. I didn't get past the receptionist. I made it patently clear that I was really fed up and frustrated. She looked put out and said she'd get the doctor to fax the letter. I don't feel at all confident about the level of care I'm receiving, and want to change my doctor as soon as I have the neurology appointment.

Exasperated

I went to the mental health drop-in centre this morning to chase my appointment for an assessment. Having already told them that I hate using the phone, the man behind the counter said I was going to have a phone assessment. Do people behind desks ever listen to what you tell them?

Dafter by the minute

I had a senior moment this morning, when thinking about the radio, or 'wireless' as we used to call it. I imagined a programme presented by Gloria Honeybutt and Esther Rancid. The guests were a rabbi and two nuns. The title of the programme was 'Talking Dirty'.

Human biology

One of these photos is of an arsehole.

Yesterday

I did something unusual after lunch yesterday; I went for a stroll round the old town and along the seafront. It was thoroughly enjoyable.

Noise

Nowadays not only is it acceptable to talk in a library, but I just witnessed someone shouting down the stairs to someone else. I have been told that a friend of a friend who works in a library says that she was told that she shouldn't challenge anyone for talking. It's typical of the poor values that have infested this country. You mustn't criticise anything for fear of upsetting someone. We have it the wrong way round. We should be compelling these people to accept proper values and standards of behaviour.

Variations on a theme

Having having eaten far too much French bread yesterday, I'm about to go to the supermarket for another loaf. Instead of cheese and salami, I'm planning peanut butter and banana.

Incomprehensible

Two women sitting behind me are speaking the strangest language. At least I think they are talking. It sounds like a sort of high-pitched meeowing with the occasional nasal interjection.

National politics

One of these people is Oswald Mosley.
One of these people had put a government into office that his own electorate voted against.
One of these people is a bumbling idiot.
One of these people is like a malevolent man from the insurance.
One of these people thinks he's Oswald Mosley.

Which is which?

Today

I love Mondays. After the music lesson I will pop up to the doctors. After that I will have dinner with my friends. It's a highlight of the week.

A drama queen

I've got an appointment with the doctor this afternoon, to tell him about my latest time as a guest of the local hospital. I do hope that he can do something to speed up my appointment with the neurologist. Surely it will be cheaper in the long run for me to be prescribed tablets, than to be ambulanced into A&E and having the same un-necessary tests done over and over again.

A man of taste?

When I dressed as a spiv, people told me how nice I looked. I dressed as a different spiv last night, and it had the same effect. I think I'll dress like that more often.

A joy forever?

I have some gold fillings in my teeth. Does that count?

Very silly

Football

I don't care about football.

Sleep

Sleep wasn't too bad last night. I only remember waking up once, but don't feel rested. I flew out of bed at 6am, had a coffee and a fag, then fell asleep for two hours.

Repeating oneself

Yesterday I had a french bread sandwich with cheddar and peppered salami, accompanied by tomatoes, spring onions and coleslaw. I enjoyed it so much that I also had it for tea. Then I had it for dinner with a bowl of chips. I can't see me having it again for a while.

A musical interlude

My left hand has not played so well ever since it was operated on. I'm trying to remedy that now. I've started practicing Chopin's Fantasie-Impromptu'. I used to give a decent account of it when I was at uni, but it made my left wrist hurt yesterday. All the more reason to persevere. I'm determined to get my playing back.

Sunday

I went to the pub late again, and I was pleased to see the people who were already there. Some customers asked me to play, which I did for a good hour. The first half was pub songs, and the second half was classical. I really appreciated the pints I was bought.

Reading

Outside the retro shop this morning, there was a box marked 'free books'. I helped myself to a crossword book and Harrap's German-English dictionary from 1907. I'm very pleased with it, and it will sit next to the French encyclopaedia I have which dates from the same period. I picked that up at a village car boot sale in Picardy.

Seagulls

On Saturday evening I heard an almighty racket coming from outside. I looked and there was a huge flock of seagulls flying round in circles outside my flat, with others joining the flock. They started soaring and dive-bombing and carried on like this for about twenty minutes before disappearing. The stupid cunts. I wished I had a bazooka at the time.

Saturday night

I went to the pub somewhat later than normal. I had a lovely night. I think I'll go at that time in future, because the people I don't want to talk to have gone by then, and the nice people are left behind.

Neurotypical?

Some of the people using the library do the most peculiar things when plugged into headphones. Now, for example, someone is singing quite loudly and extremely badly. If I had a taser he wouldn't be doing that for much longer.

People

I went for a walk along the seafront shortly ago. In that time I bumped into four sets of people I know. People who hadn't seen me lately were asking after my health. It's so nice that it matters to people.

Later on

I'm making another cocido-type meal today, and then I plan on reading for a bit. If I go to the pub, it won't be until quite late. See how it goes.

A forthcoming visit

I am expecting my friend from Germany to arrive on Saturday. We're gonna have some fun! I hope the weather stays as fantastic as it is now.

Intelligence?

I still haven't found my favourite tobacconist. I'll just keep trying. He's bound to turn up before long.

Wildlife

On the way to the library, I saw two seagulls fighting ferociously in the road. I love nature.

Memory lane

When I wear the cloth cap, and when I hear the East-Enders at the pub, I have vivid recollections of my family. What I remember first is what a bunch of cunts most of them were.

The melodrama continues

I've got an appointment with my doctor on Monday afternoon. I have to tell him that I've had another fit and spent another afternoon and evening in A&E. This is getting really boring. I hope he can do something to speed up my neurologist's appointment.

People

People never cease to surprise me. When I went to the pub yesterday, lots of people asked me how I was. I am really heartened and sometimes overwhelmed by people's goodness and kind words.

Not news

Football is so fucking boring. I watch it occasionally if I fancy any of the players, but I don't give a stuff about it otherwise. There is only one thing more boring than football, and that's all the shite people talk about it. I get angry that some people are paid a huge salary for talking bollocks about shite.

Weird

I don't know why people are so negative about our beautiful town. People don't know how lucky they are. They can't realise that they have more artificial limbs, walking-sticks, tractors and wheely-walkers per head of the population than anywhere else in the country. People in the Outer Orkneys would give their eye-teeth to have access to this amount of care.

Modern art

Last night I got talking to the lady who said she would try and get me some funding for postgraduate study. First of all she seemed shocked by my perceived political incorrectness. The fact that I was referring to myself didn't alter the situation. Then we talked about Mondrian and a local celebrity who is a world-famous artist. She waxed lyrical about the said artist, while I condemned the artist's work as a piss-take and a load of shite. The lady commented that the artist was just being honest. My response was that people can be honest with expressing themselves through images, then surely they have the right to express themselves honestly through words. I rest my case.

Healthy living

I know I am lazy when it comes to eating fruit and salad. Today I had both tomatoes and spring onions with my lunch, and a banana for afters. I feel quite pleased with myself.

A result

The cloth cap I wear when I play is too small. In fact I sometimes feel like my eyes are starting to protrude when I wear it. A short while ago I found a much nicer one in a charity shop on the High Street, and the nice lady let me have it for 50p. I am really pleased with it, and it fits beautifully.

Last night

There was a slight hiccup last night, in that my dinner turned out awful, so I had  a cheese roll instead. I wanted to have a hamburger from the bar near to where I play, but they shut early. What a bummer. When I got home I had a Toffee Crisp and a fag instead.

Now

I'm about to have a fag on the way to that bedlam of a supermarket. The only reason I go there now, is to buy things that aren't sold in the German supermarket. I'm building myself up to dodging the wankers on tractors.

The weather

Again, the weather continues beautiful. Blue skies, warm sunshine, the lot. I am so lucky.

Morons

Two wankers behind me are having a row across the library. I'm surprised they can read, when I listen to their vocabulary.

My usual state

I'm still buzzing with yesterday, and the lovely atmosphere. I'm completely inundated with thoughts and emotions, but on this occasion I'm really happy for it. I was with people that I enjoy being with, and that was lovely. I hope every Friday night will be like yesterday.

Very drole

This reminds me of an advert for instant mashed potatoes, which they showed when I was a teenager.

Aspergers again

Last night, the East-End folk kept on paying me compliments such as 'He's wonderful' etc. I know they were being kind and expressing their enjoyment, but I felt really uncomfortable and embarrassed. I nearly burst into tears at one point, but managed to compose myself.

Another musical interlude

My friends have asked me back on Friday to play for another of their sons' birthday. I am really humbled that it was the boy's request that I play. That is the best compliment of all.

More about Aspergers

While I was playing last night, I was unsettled by the disappearance of a large group of regulars and friends. I thought they were annoyed by my playing, and thought I was heading for a massive flop. After I had finished playing, I had some reassuring news. I was told that people had gone outside because of the heat, and had been singing there. What a relief!

A musical interlude

Yesterday I played the first of my scheduled Friday night slots. It was a resounding success, and the turnout was exceptional. Apart from the regulars, my friends from London were there, and so were the elderly East-Enders. I played and they sang continuously for two hours. I was asked to play after I'd finished, so I played just one song. A couple of patriotic songs were requested at least twice, on account of the wretched football. 'Hitler's only got one ball' was successful, and we had it about four times. Afterwards I had a couple of pints with friends. Lovely.

Last night

I went to the pub around 8pm, so I could get the song-sheets ready in time for 9pm. Several friends were there, so the evening got off to a good start. There was lots of chatter, laughter and fun. I turned up looking like a wartime spiv, and everyone told me how nice I looked. Strange! It was a lovely evening with lovely people.

Soon

I have something really boring ahead of me this afternoon. I'm going to do something I don't often do nowadays; I'm going to have a stroll round the old town. I need to build myself up. Besides, I'm in that sort of mood.

A slight cold

I'm surrounded by people sniffling away in a most grotesque and revolting manner. I don't know whether I should offer them tissues (I assume the people know what they are), or sing 'Colonel Bogey'.

Modern art

Mondrian seems to be all the rage here at the moment. I can't see why. His pictures look exactly like the colour charts produced by paint manufacturers. It's lazy art. Mondrian's a cunt.

Birds

I found out that the reason the seagulls were making such a din the other night was because of a huge blaze in the High Street, which unsettled them. That doesn't explain why they did the same thing last night. Let me tell you why seagulls make a racket. It's because they are cunts.

Let me explain

Yesterday on Facebook I shared Asperger Mexico's posting about Autistic Pride Day. I'll tell you why. I like blokes but don't consider myself gay, in that I don't feel any affinity at all with the 'cultural' package. When I was a teenager and a young man I used to identify very strongly with the movement, because the law gave neither rights nor protection. Nowadays, thanks to the EEC, these injustices have been redressed, so I don't need to make a noise any more. The reason that I shared the Facebook posting yesterday is to help give a voice to people who go through life unheard, as I did for most of my life. I want better provision in healthcare resources and a reduction in the unacceptably long time most people have to wait to access services.Until that time comes I will do my bit.

Tonight

I'm looking forward to tonight. Two friends will be down from London, having just returned from their holiday in France. I'm dying to hear about it.

A weirdo

I'm feeling strangely cheerful at the moment. I wonder if I'm going round the bend.

Topiary

I've just been to the barbers and have a radical new look; so radical in fact, that I haven't looked like this for decades.

Looking the part

When I play at the pub tonight, I will go dressed as a wartime spiv; suit, over-the-top tie, hobnail boots, flat cap and a white carnation from my window-box. Ha!!!

Re yesterday

I didn't make it to the tobacconist yesterday, but I have received intelligence that he's in town this afternoon. Good man.

Now

I feel much better than I did yesterday. The knee's still a bit sore, and the bruise could have been designed by Whistler. The dull headache has eased off considerably. I'm on the mend.

The weather

We had an absolutely gorgeous orange and pink sunset yesterday. Today we have clear blue skies and warmth. What else could one ask for?

Sleep

Sleep was a bit bumpy again last night. I woke up several times before finally getting up at 7.30am. Very boring, and very tiring.

Happy and glorious?

At the pub I play patriotic songs on occasion. There is part of the national anthem which reminds me of this picture.

Today

In a minute I'm going to get some things from the German supermarket, ready for when my friend arrives next Saturday. This afternoon I'm going for a haircut, which I now desperately need. I'm fed up and embarrassed looking like the wolf-man of Borneo.

A musical interlude

From tonight I will have a two-hour slot at the pub on Fridays. It will be great to have a regular singalong, just like they did in the olden days.

Last night

After a simple but satisfying dinner, I sat down and started to pick at the Kenneth Williams diaries. He was a very clever man, but with a whole pile of chips on his shoulder. The diaries make strange reading, but are very eloquently written. Three hours later I remembered I wanted to go to the pub, so wandered off there for a couple of hours. Lovely.

The disgrace

I wonder if our MP will sign it. He's a tory.

Words of wisdom

I couldn't put it better.

A disgrace

I found this link on Facebook. In the nineteenth century, people with mental health issues were put into workhouse infirmaries, being variously described as imbeciles, idiots, lunatics and feeble-minded. Standards of care have improved marginally in the meanwhile, but the Government is looking back fondly to those earlier times with a view to cutting the little care that currently exists. It's another shameful example of a conservative government washing its hands of the vulnerable, in order to save money. People have short memories.

The weather

The sky has become much more overcast since lunch time, but it still feels warm and humid. I wonder if we're in for a storm?

A surprise

I am astonished to note that today, the number of hits achieved by my blog has exceeded 10,000. When I first started writing, I didn't expect more than a few hits a month. It just shows you.

A phone call

I took a phone call from my friend in London. I dread these calls because I hate telephones and hate talking to the thing. She still works at the place where I last worked, and it sounds like it's getting even nastier now. I think she's looking forward to her redundancy in about a month's time. She'll realise what it's like to have a life.

This afternoon

It will need to be an easy one today. I've got some frozen stuff to make an easy dinner from. I'll take it from there.

Intelligent life

As I walked up to the library, a woman who was in front of me started teetering from side to side and slowing down. As I passed her, I saw that she was rummaging through her handbag, and her face was almost buried in it. The silly mare. Couldn't she stand aside and do that?

Anzeige

Wir freuen uns schon, den Staatsbesuch der königlichen Wuppertaler Botschaft, der am 28-ten Juni stattfindet. Die Empfangskommittee wird anwesend bei der Ankunft des königlichen Zuges.

Relatively speaking

Just now I bumped into someone I know socially, and we got talking. In the past couple of days, while I was 'indisposed', his life has been overtaken by the most destabilising train of events. I hope he'll be ok.

Now

As I sit here amongst the constant swirl of thoughts, memories etc, I can't help noticing through the window how beautiful the weather is. I'm so lucky to be able to enjoy it from such a lovely town as this.

A nice smoke

I'll go for a little wander later on, to see if my friendly tobacconist is back in town.

Sickening

On Tuesday, an old man in the next booth had his wife and granddaughter with him. I could hear them making light of how he wouldn't co-operate with the medical staff. In fact he was being deliberately obstructive. If I had any say in it, the nurses should have pulled all his tubes out and left him to get on with it, the selfish cunt.

Just now

The other day I bent the arms on my glasses. Although my nose is so big, I had a job keeping them on my face. The nice lady at the opticians has just done a good job of fixing them.

Cacophony

I was wide awake at 4am and listened to the strangest seagull noises known to man. It sounded like Jurassic Park. I could also hear a cat meeowing in one of the nearby flats. If anyone has a spare animal or two, please drop them round for 4am tomorrow, so we can have a sponsored noiseothon.

In a moment

Shortly I'll pop down to the supermarket to get a couple of bits and bobs. Then I'll have a bit of breakfast before sitting by the sea.

Memory

When the ambulance crew interviewed me the other day, I couldn't remember what had happened immediately before the fit. At the time I thought it had come without warning. I now remember what did happen. It was exactly the same as the others.

More about Aspergers

I experienced many periods of 'half-sleep' yesterday, and remember how active my mind was at the time. There were occasions where I was very angry with myself for being unable to settle down.

Broadcasters

Broadcasting companies spend vast sums on meteorologists and weather forecasts. Why? If we relied on most of the gloomy predictions we'd never leave our homes. Meteorology is a cunt.

The weather

It's beautiful today with bright, warm sunshine. I'm glad I didn't listen to the weather forecast because it would have been cold and rainy.

Back to normal?

I slept most of yesterday on and off. I added variety to my life by alternating between the bed and the sofa. I don't feel nearly as weak as I did, although I do feel battered. There's not much to show for it though, except for the bruise on the right of my left knee. I have come off lucky.

Bored

I'm sitting her like a complete idiot. I think it's time to go home.

Highly annoying

Two local wankers are talking shit nearby. I think that something at least as strong as an exocet is required.

Epitaph

In my case, for 'bitch' substitute 'cunt'.

Shabby

As I walked along the street just now, I saw that a soiled nappy was lying on the pavement. Vile.

Rameau-Les Sauvages

I went home after I last wrote, and had a light breakfast. Then I got stuck into volume four of Edward Walford's London Recollected and found myself in a sort of limbo, where I felt neither awake nor asleep. I soon got fed up with that, so came back to the library to continue my memwahs.
After I got home last night I heard a dreadful cacophony and some loud crashes. When I looked out of the window, two nomadic adults looked on gleefully as a nomadic youngster kicked the side of every car he walked past. Lovely, I don't think. Then I thought of a piece of ballet music (also transcribed for harpsichord by the composer) by Rameau, entitled 'Les Sauvages'. I know which particular Sauvages I prefer.

Football

I agree.

Today

I feel a bit sore today. I bashed the inside of my left knee joint, and that has started to swell. I also hit the left side of my head and am a bit sore there. I am exhausted so will go back to bed as soon as I've finished writing.

Sleep

I went to bed at 10pm. Although I fell asleep quite quickly I didn't manage to stay asleep for long. I spent the night waking up and falling asleep as usual.

Yesterday evening

I arrived at the hospital around 3.30pm and was let out at 8pm. I made my way home, cooked some rice and warmed up the curry that I'd defrosted. I didn't enjoy it so put it aside while I tried to watch an old film. I couldn't concentrate on it so switched it off, and enjoyed the rest of my dinner cold.

Yesterday

I went to the pub early to celebrate a friend's birthday, as I wanted to avoid the evening's crowd. I sat outside and talked to some other people I knew. I went to the loo and felt funny afterwards. I came round with my head on the pedestal and the seat broken, with my feet wedged against the wall. The I came round again sprawled out over the loo. I went outside and lay down on a bench, and was taken to A&E by ambulance. They did all the same tests as previously. They also checked my blood. Unsurprisingly everything was clear. I've been to the doctors today to try and hurry up the neurologists appointment but can't see him until Monday afternoon. How many more of these bloody things am I supposed to go through before I finally see someone? I can't help being a freak.

A previous incarnation

Yesterday I read through some of the essays I wrote whilst studying for my degree. It was strange, as if they had been written by someone else. Of course I remember writing them, and I remember what I had written, but I was shocked by how good they were. When I think about it they were written by a different person, as I am not the same person now that I was then.

More about Aspergers

I notice that the sun has just put in an appearance, so I've just been noseying out of the window. As I look at people I wonder what they are thinking, and if I have anything in common with them. They seem just as detached and isolated from the rest of mankind as I feel. I wonder if they build themselves barriers when they go outside?

Help!

I can hear the lobotomy woman guffawing and blathering in the next room. She's the zombie that keeps popping up when I'm here. There aught to be a law against her roaming abroad without responsible adult supervision.

More seagulls

I can see and hear another flock of seagulls. They're swooping down like a bunch of Bessarabian Shitehawks. I wish the council would invest in a few breeding pairs of Eagle Owls.

Hope

I hope I'm not completely cracking up, but I have the feeling that my situation is going to improve very soon. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it's not all in my imagination.

The weather

The weather started off dark and dreary again today, but has already started to brighten up and feel warmer. I do hope it continues to do so.

Good food

At lunchtime I will have one of my favourite things; a slice of toast and peanut butter, half a slice of toast with blackcurrant jam, and half a slice of toast with marmalade. Dinner will also be nice and easy, as I'm defrosting some kheema curry from the weekend. All I need to do is some vegetables and pappadoms.

Mi boca grande

Hace muy pocos minutos escribí que era muy tranquilo en la biblioteca. Creo que alguién ha leido mis palabras, porque ahora hay tanto ruido.

A musical interlude

My friends' seven year old has a marvellous and funny imagination. Yesterday he thought of arming my piano with a whole arsenal of weapons, sweets and cider, to fire at unsuspecting listeners.It's got me thinking now.

Spooky

It is strangely quiet in the library today. Has there been a mass-extinction during the night?

Jetzt

Nun ist mein Gehirn unheimlich beschäftig und überfüllt. Eins nach dem anderen und alle zusammen sehe Ich all meiner Erlebnisse. Ich habe es satt soviel zu denken.

Seagulls

Before I went to the pub, I heard an almighty racket coming from outside my window. I looked and saw a flock of seagulls coming in to land. When I stuck my head outside the window I saw four seagulls at right-angles to each other, all pulling at the same scrap of food. This went on for some time, and so did the noise. Seagulls are cunts.

Sleep

I didn't stay asleep for very long before I was awake again. I woke up several times during the night and each time had difficulty falling asleep again. I dreamed about the town where I grew up, and an office where I used to work. Ain't it boring.

The weather

Last night it was quite windy, and the wind blew from the direction that throws massive waves over the harbour. It wasn't doing so as I walked home, because the tide was too far out. When I went to bed, I heard (or imagined) that I could hear the sea boiling up behind the harbour. It was very relaxing and I fell asleep quickly.

Last night

After the lesson I had a lovely dinner with close friends, as usual. Afterwards I was surprised and delighted by a lovely home-made Victoria Sponge, which my friend had baked to celebrate the first anniversary of my moving to this town. They all sang 'Happy Anniversary' to me. That was lovely, but made me squirm a bit! Afterwards I went home, watched a couple of documentaries and had a read. I went to the pub very late. It was a good evening.

Talking to oneself?

Please, please someone, please let me have a rocket launcher to silence someone nearby who won't stop talking to herself.

A job of work

I haven't been successful with my job applications to date. Next month there is going to be a jobs fair, where one can meet employers directly. I've booked a place to attend. Wish me luck.

The weather

The weather has got much nicer this afternoon, after this morning's unpromising start. I'm quite looking forward to my evening in.

A pillar of the community?

I've just discovered from online Government records, that my ancestor received a three month sentence at Deptford Petty Sessions in 1837. He served his time at Maidstone Gaol. This is the same person who was robbed when he 'fell asleep' in a pub two years later.

The drop-in centre

I've just paid them a visit and completed a form. They will invite me in for an assessment in about a week. I know I have to wait about a year for my referral to the ASD centre, but I'm going to see what I can find for myself in the meantime.

Tonight

I plan to stay at home and watch dvds or documentaries. I know that I'm definitely not an alcoholic now, as abstinence has no effect on me.

The weather

It's murky and cool today, and the clouds threaten rain. I don't mind, because it's so much nicer here than in London.

The national celebrity

The same woman who was shocked and outraged that I don't like football also asked me if I was sad that a national celebrity had died. I said that I wasn't as I didn't know him. The sadness was surely something for his family and loved ones. She gave the same reaction.

Football

I've managed to come this far without hearing any news of the World Cup. A woman I spoke to on Saturday looked first shocked and then outraged when I told her I had no interest in football. Weird.

Boring

I'm currently being regaled with the annoying thick community on her mobile. I seem to bump into this bint most days. The finger of doom?

Dakshinamurthe (Idol of the south)

I first heard this song when I was eighteen years old. The kids performing it here are seriously talented.

More about Aspergers

"You've always got to be different". That's what my parents used to say to me when I tried to say what I thought. We used to live in a sort of socialist republic where everyone had to have the same, equally. Well I suppose I was different. I used to like my 'classical' music, encyclopaedias, flowers and stamp collection, instead of the football, television and pop music that everyone else liked. I still feel that I am different to most of the people I encounter. I don't mean that I am better or superior to them, it's just that my way of thinking is different. I feel that the way I think can be a barrier between me and others. I often think that I've completely broken down that barrier, but sometimes it completely rebuilds itself again. I wonder from time to time if life would be better if I lived in relative seclusion.

A funny video

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=433836840042097

This afternoon

I've got my highlight of the week in the form of a keyboard lesson followed by a lovely dinner with lovely people.

Sleep

My sleep continued to be very disrupted. I seem to feel more or less permanently tired these days. Yesterday evening I nodded off for about an hour while I was reading. I'm going to talk to the drop-in centre about it.

A ray of sunshine?

When I was at the workhouse earlier, I saw a poster re mental health issues. I've just been on their website and found the organisation in question has a drop-in centre right near where I am now. I'll pay them a visit shortly.

This morning

The depression is back with a vengeance, and for no reason at all. I've thought a lot, and realise that what I need is some time to myself, without having people around me. I don't want that all the time, because that's what my life used to be like. It's difficult to be around people when I feel like this, because they pick up on one's mood.

Sunday

I had a quiet day, and spent the time reading and playing mah jong on the computer. After dinner I watched some more history documentaries and enjoyed the quiet.

Saturday

I went to the pub later than usual. I saw close friends and family, which was nice. Football was all the rage. That was nice too, because I felt like being quiet. I sat outside, although it was chilly compared to the previous night, and enjoyed looking at the sea.

Just now

I did try to have a nap, but as usual I didn't manage it. I can't see me going out later.

Are they talking about football?

Very funny.

Now

I'm going to go home and put my poor old aching bones on the sofa. I'll see if I can sleep for a bit.

Football

I am pleased to say that I've met several people who say they can't stand football. I'm pleased because it's nice not to be in a minority of one.

Today

I'm going to have a simple meal later, probably Indian vegetarian. I don't know if I'm going out later.

A musical interlude

I didn't play last night, for a change. The people didn't arrive because they went dancing instead. This time I didn't mind at all.

An anniversary

I moved to this town exactly a year ago.

Dreams

Whenever I remember my dreams, they tend to be recurring ones. I wonder if I only ever have the same dreams? I don't ever remember dreaming about anything else.

Sleep

I slept particularly badly last night. I was either awake or half asleep for most of it. I woke up very late and feel worn out. I'm going to lie down today.

While I was out

I got talking to someone at the pub, who thinks she may be able to help me get funding for postgraduate study. Wow!!!

Last night

I had a nice time at the pub, chatting to friends.

The weather

The weather continues glorious today, and it feels even hotter than yesterday. This afternoon I'll make a very simple dinner before going to the pub, where I expect to enjoy the sea view and a nice pint.

A musical interlude

I'm expecting the return of some hard-core East-Enders at the pub tonight, so I suppose I'll do another singalong for them. Unfortunately they seem to get on people's nerves somewhat, but the longer I keep them singing, the more pints they will buy. Actually I don't mind these people. The only thing I find scary is that their voices, mannerisms and behaviour remind me of my Dad's family (or what I remember of them, that is).

Bad weather

I do not watch the television and don't read newspapers. It came as a great shock to me today when I read an email from my German friend, describing the most terrible storm that hit them earlier in the week. I am so relieved that he wasn't hurt. I know that some people may be shocked that I am unmoved by the deaths of people I don't know personally. This piece of news is much more upsetting to me, in that I have a close friend involved in it.

Vocabulary

If one is not allowed to use the word 'cunt' in connection with a man, is one also not allowed to use the word 'wanker' in connection with a woman?

Annoyed of Wolverhampton

Two hags are sitting a few seats away from me, and they haven't stopped gabbing since they arrived. What is even worse is that they look like two un-cared for compost heaps.

Now

Here I am back amongst the peasantry at the library. Mobile phones and babblers galore.

A classy lady

One of my favourite character actresses is the late Patricia Hayes. She generally played comedy roles, but here she is at her serious best in Edna the inebriate Woman. Unfortunately I have only found part two.

High culture

Another one of my favourite songs, but for different reasons. I have found myself being upbraided for promiscuous usage of this word on sundry occasions.

Boccherini-Fandango

This is one of my favourite pieces of all. I have posted the original guitar quintet movement, and the composer's own transcription for two harpsichords. Stunning.

About myself

I have gone through life generally feeling isolated from the rest of humanity. I didn't know it before, but I now realise that was because of my Aspergers mind-set. I have generally felt myself to be right at the bottom of the pile, as it were, completely lacking in confidence and with a feeling of being totally inferior to everyone else. I don't suppose these feelings will ever go completely away, but I now have a sense of inclusion and equality in my life. I am inferior to no-one.

Sport

Sport is a cunt. A complete waste of money. An international disgrace. Completely immoral. Hateful.

A matter of no small importance

Apparently the world cup started yesterday. So what. The money that is chucked at the game is totally obscene, when one considers all the people in the world who live in want. We are living under a regime of austerity. Nurses continue to be greatly under-valued. Footballers live in great luxury. Come on world, where are your fucking priorities?

Bliss!

Today I am writing from the peace and quiet of my friends' kitchen. It really is a haven of tranquillity. I am free of the noisy, irritating cunts that plague one at the library. I am enjoying the luxury of being able to think without the mindless interruptions that annoy me so much.

Sleep

It wasn't great again last night. I dreamed lucidly but kept waking up, immediately forgetting what I had dreamed about. It does leave one feeling very tired.

A panacea for all ills

I still believe that responsible people should be allowed to own and carry harpoon guns. The other day I watched a ridiculous hovercraft going up and down, and I really wanted to harpoon gun the air cushion.

A national menace

I have just been standing outside my friends' house enjoying a fag in the sun. While I was there I noticed a woman on a tractor whizzing dangerously along the pavement opposite, before turning onto the road itself and then disrupting the traffic. These vehicles are spreading like the measles. I am alarmed to note that two regulars at the pub are now conveying themselves on these dangerous vehicles. This has given me a brilliant idea; I think we should all have them, then we can do banger racing along the harbour.

More about Aspergers

I spend much of my time thinking (and worrying) about my relationships with people. I live in constant dread of either having misunderstood, or of having been misunderstood. I had plenty of time for reflection as I sat outside with my cider, and am as certain as I can be that my understanding is correct. It's nice to know that you're not going completely round the bend.

A new development

Yesterday a pop-up bar opened about two doors down from my local. Apparently it's open for the duration of the world cup, and has a large television screen broadcasting football outside. Well I can't stand football and like my local, so I don't think I'll be patronising the place.

Yesterday evening

I had my meal a bit earlier than normal. It was fast food a la takeaway style; frozen pizza, frozen chips and coleslaw. Very nice indeed! Afterwards I took myself down to the pub and basked in the beautiful sunshine with a nice pint, whilst enjoying the sea view. I spent most of the evening with friends and family, and had a lovely time.

A national celebrity

People are still talking about the television personality who died the other day. I don't get it.

Now

I still feel very tired, but have been unable to sleep. When I get home I'll play mah jong on the computer. It occupies my mind completely for the short time I play it.

Fed up

A friend of mine is getting really fed up with the way his new manager has been treating him. I have offered to harpoon-gun the individual, but my friend was silly enough to decline the offer.

More about Aspergers

The feelings I am about to describe may seem odd to some of you, but I believe that they are something to do with my mindset. These feelings are recognised by all the aspies I have discussed them with.
For me the whole issue is to do with uncertainty. My mind is always full to overflowing with thoughts, feelings, people, conversations et al. The Aspergers mind is highly analytical, or over-analytical in my case. I think, sift the relevant facts, and analyse those facts. I do this repeatedly and can come to different conclusions along the way. I cannot read body language and nuance, so often find myself wondering where I am with people. The people I am closest to do not cause me this worry, as I feel completely at ease with them. Even with my closest ones though, I still go through the same mental process.
A by-product of this is the feeling that if something is not right, then it is my own fault. I've always done this for as long as I can remember.
Even today, when I am happy on the face of it, there is always this element in the background. It's quite odd to me, that I feel quite detached from my feelings as I write.

This afternoon

I'm doing something this afternoon which is completely against my nature. I cook fresh food practically every day, but today I'm having a frozen pizza with frozen chips. They won't be frozen when I eat them, of course. It's the nearest I can get at home to eating something which has been made by someone else.

Dreams

Last night I had some of those weird dreams with a recurrent theme. I remember being in the new town where I grew up. I was with a couple who were visiting me, but I don't remember who they were. I remember us all crossing the road to the bus stop. The route number on the bus stop was different to the one I remember (in real life), and I became confused. We decided to walk down the road for a bit, and ran to the next stop when we saw a bus coming. For some reason we decided not to get the bus, and crossed the road and got one in the opposite direction instead.
I have thought about these dreams and have already associated them with Aspergers. They are to do with a journey. They are also to do with errors in communication, and with misunderstanding the world about one. They are also to do with being unaware of the people around one. Food for thought?

Now

I'll go home via the sea front and enjoy a fag along the way. I really feel that I'd like to have a nap, but probably won't end up having one. My latest attempts at having a nap have been unsuccessful.

People

One of my family runs a very successful supper club for people with special dietary needs. The next meal is in two days time, and some people have just cancelled at this late stage. Why are people so thoughtless? I can tell you why. People are cunts.

This morning

I woke up at about 8am and started the day with a bowl of cereal, before moving on to the coffee and fags. I'm in an odd sort of mood, probably because I'm feeling so tired. On the face of it I feel quite content, but I suspect the depression is lurking somewhere in the background, and waiting to pounce.

Sleep

It was all disjointed again last night. As usual I woke up several times, but managed to fall asleep again. I was wrong about the juvenile seagulls, as I heard them again during the night and this morning. They sound like overblown saxophones. Very annoying.

Blah blah

The noisy cunts have taken over the library again.

The weather

The weather continues beautiful today and it's already feeling quite warm. I think this afternoon is going to be a scorcher.

Last night

I reheated the leftovers from Tuesday, and they tasted even better than the first time round. I went to the pub slightly earlier than normal, so that I could enjoy the fine weather. I spent time with friends, and then a family member arrived. It was lovely just sitting outside and nattering. As it got to 8pm people started arriving for the pub quiz. I greeted the people I wanted to greet, then left. At home I fried some frozen chips and had these with coleslaw, while watching history documentaries. It was a nice evening.

Escape

I'm just about to go home and give my ears a rest. I'll have a fag or two by the sea on the way.

See what I mean?

I rest my case.

How am I?

People really get on my fucking nerves when they won't stop talking. It's just annoying when it's third persons who are talking. When I am the person who is spoken at I feel very uncomfortable, even ill under certain conditions. What is the matter with people? Just because they have mouths, does it mean they need to be in constant use? Do they understand the meaning of the word 'quiet' aka 'shut the fuck up'.

This afternoon

It still feels very hot, and that makes me feel lazy. I'm tired anyway from where my sleep isn't altogether satisfactory. I shan't have to cook today, except to heat up some leftovers from yesterday. I'll try and have a short nap when I get in.

Party politics

I can't understand why none of the mainstream political parties has any plans to re-introduce the ducking stool. If any of the politicians were sitting where I am now, they too would be begging for it.

Personal arms

The carrying of weapons is generally illegal in this country, and rightly so. However I don't see why an exception couldn't be made for rocket launchers. They are safer than guns. I'm sure they don't kill as many people as guns do in the USA.

Wishful thinking

This is what I'd like to do to the two bints behind me whose voices are like foghorns.

Do you know?

Some of the thickest people known to man live round here. They look to morons and imbeciles when they want to know something.

Lost property

Last week I lost one of the rubber feet from my piano stool when I was taking it to my friends for the party. I found it just now in a pothole outside my flats. Very pleased to have it back.

I wonder

Does this town have a higher incidence of mental retardation than the national average?

A favourite song?

I really detest this song. I used to play it for the pub singalongs, thinking that people liked it. I was so relieved when I was asked to desist.

Tempus fugit

It seems strange to think that on Saturday, I will have been living in this town for exactly one year. I feel as if I've always lived here, but of course I know I haven't. I have a sense of belonging now, that I've never had before.

A musical interlude

When I got to the pub yesterday, the bunch of East-Enders were there who had come to the D-Day singalong. I seem to have become their best friend, and they had brought some friends along to sing. I duly obliged. It's nice that people come there for that reason.

Tonight

I'll go to the pub after dinner. They have got a pub quiz on tonight, so I'll sit outside until it's over. I used to like quizzes but find them boring now. They are supposed to be fun, but people take them far too seriously.

Now

My brain has been working piecemeal today, as usual. I feel a bit unsettled with all the thinking, but I hope a walk to the German supermarket might sort that out. I feel unusually hungry this morning but I don't know why, so I'll have a bit of breakfast when I get home.

Sleep

I woke up a few times during the night, but didn't stay awake for long. It would be so nice to go to sleep one night, and stay asleep until it's time to get up. I understand that sleep is an issue for many people with Aspergers; either getting to sleep in the first place, staying asleep, or managing to sleep at all.

Seagulls

This morning I've noticed that I don't hear any more of the caterwauling of the juvenile birds. Either they've all died overnight, have flown off, or have all learned their adult calls at the same time.

The weather

Yesterday the weather was beautiful all afternoon. It's just the same now, and is predicted to stay good all day. It's so much more comfortable by the coast than in London.

Yesterday

I cooked myself a cocido-type thing, only with chillis in it, and thoroughly enjoyed what I'd made. It's a good job because I'm having the rest today. I wandered up the pub a bit later and had a lovely evening with family and friends. Three of us had a game of scrabble later on, which we all found boring.

Scary

I am terrified of things that throw you around. Just looking at this thing makes me feel sick.

Dietary advice

Very daft!

Hablar

Porqué la gente habla de nada que la mierda? Ya entiendo que todo el mundo tiene una boca, pero hay muchos que no han recibido un cerebro.

Un éspoir

Que les gens se taissent.

Earlier on

I'm trying to keep the habit going of having something for lunch. I'd forgotten how much I enjoy something as simple and delicious as blackcurrant jam. It goes down a treat with warm crusty bread.

Stalkers

I am now convinced that I am being stalked by hundreds of pairs of women when I come to the library. As soon as they sit down, they start talking foreign. They keep following me here. Boo hoo.

Tonight

I have been living the temperance life since Sunday. I like a drink but know I'm not an alcoholic, because I've had no issues at all. But now I've had enough piety for a while so will go to the pub tonight after dinner, as usual.

A new chat-line

It makes a change from the ones that normally advertise in the papers!