Sunday 30 November 2014
Christmas
Is Cliff Richard doing another of those wretched Christmas songs this year? I bloody well hope not. They are very vomit-making.
A musical interlude
On Saturday I'm playing harpsichord music at the local ancient building, as it's their Christmas open day. I understand the Mayor and all the gentry will be there, like they were when I played last year. People still comment on how the music enhances the building's atmosphere.
On Sunday week I'll be playing Christmas carols outside my friends' cafe, with or without singers. I'll get song-sheets printed for then.
On 18th December I'm going to play for a national charity's Christmas party for old people. I'm really looking forward to that.
On Sunday week I'll be playing Christmas carols outside my friends' cafe, with or without singers. I'll get song-sheets printed for then.
On 18th December I'm going to play for a national charity's Christmas party for old people. I'm really looking forward to that.
A traditional Christmas
This is dinnertime for women at the Holborn (Mitcham) Workhouse.
In our own age there are people who still live in chronic want, and will not be overindulging in good living.
I struggle with these thoughts every time Christmas comes round.
Christmas
I really don't like this time of the year. Most days are dull and dark, cold and damp. Also there is the buildup to Christmas. For one thing I'm not a Christian, so it seems irrelevant to me. I feel a (probably self-imposed) need to comply with tradition, although I don't particularly want to. We have a glut of advertisements trying to persuade us to buy luxury items, and persuading us that we really need them. Adverts for toys blackmail parents through their children. This is really hard for people who are not well off. Charities feed the poor and keep them warm for a day or two, which is nice, but isn't their need at least as great for the rest of the year? There is so much hypocrisy. Be nice to everyone for one day, and that makes up for one's indifference for the rest of the time. It upsets me. I'm spending Christmas Day with friends. This is unusual for me, in that I don't celebrate it, but they already know how I feel about it all. I won't spoil the day, and am certainly looking forward to spending it with them, but I know there won't be any fuss.
Later on
I think I might go for a little stroll along the coast. I know it's cold today, but I don't mind that. It'll deter people from walking their dogs. Dinner will be nice and easy today; a portion of my own curry from the freezer, and I'll make parathas to go with it. Sorted.
The weather
It's been dark ever since I woke up, and the air is cold and damp. I wonder if winter is just around the corner.
Sleep
I don't remember much about last night's drink-induced slumber, apart from waking up several times to pull the bedding back over me.
Desperation
The last place we went to last night was a 'gay' bar. It was both sleazy and depressing. I had absolutely nothing in common with the people who were there. I found their antics both bizarre and grotesque. I'm not knocking their choices and freedoms in life. It's just that for me, it is a completely alien world. As time went on I felt myself getting increasingly upset. On top of all the theatricals, the music they played was making me feel strange. I could feel the drums in my feel and chest, and thought I was going to cry. I don't know why but I felt unable to move, and stood pressed against the wall, talking to one of my close people. I was helped out of the room by a friend and went home. I don't like that life one bit. It's all very depressing.
Getting the hump
I'm afraid I almost lost my temper with a stupid and opinionated bitch who works for the council. I don't do nepotism and made sure she was the first to know about it. I also don't care one bit for her connections. we used to call these people 'the brown tongue brigade'.
Our town
The council have just put up the Christmas decorations. Everything is simple and understated, which is exactly how I like it. The old town looks quite beautiful when it is lit up, and I took lots of photos on my rounds.
Booze
Nowadays I live a life of almost total abstinence. Yesterday I got through cider, prosecco, gin and white wine.It took me two hours to get out of bed this morning.
Last night
I started watching a film version of 'Tom Jones' with a very good cast; Albert Finney, Susannah York, Edith Evans, Joan Greenwood etc, but it was a bit 'sixties' for my liking. I got bored, because I wanted a healthy dose of eighteenth century, so I took myself out for a pint. I bumped into people I am close to, and ended up drinking in three different establishments.
Saturday 29 November 2014
Today
I feel noticeably different since I gave up tobacco. My lungs continue to rid themselves of tar, I cough less, and breathe much better. That's a real result.
Drastic measures
I bought half a dozen mousetraps this morning. I don't feel at all happy about using them, as they are cruel, but I can't go on having mice in my flat.
William Hogarth; Gin Lane (1751)
Last night
I went to the pub a bit earlier this week, so I could have a natter with my friends in the caff. Luckily the cunts weren't there. Luckier still they didn't show up at all. I could have done cartwheels all along the front! There was a good turnout of people whose company I really enjoy. Nobody sang to start with, so I sat in the corner playing a selection of music-hall songs. One lady joined in. About an hour into my session people burst spontaneously into song, which was lovely. I had some fun, speeding up towards the end of a song, or doing the 'Les Dawson' bit to the tunes, which people found very funny. I played 'Happy Birthday' twice for a mate who was there. Afterwards I spent time working my way round the room and chatting to people. Fantastic!!!
Yesterday evening
I had itchy feet and they got itchier by the minute, so I took myself to the hospital an hour early for the MRI scan. It was brilliant; they weren't busy so saw me immediately. I expect the results in about a fortnight. I must say the staff are very good there. People like to complain about the NHS (compensation culture and all that). All I can say is that they have always been good when I've needed them. We're so lucky to have it.
Friday 28 November 2014
A living national treasure?
This man's knowledge of all subjects, both known and unknown, is truly marvellous.
Pandering to bigots
What term would Japanese reactionaries prefer for what happened?
Now
I'm round my friends' house instead of at the library. It's so much nicer. Luckily I left there before any of the herberts turned up.
Genealogy
I've done a bit more digging and found some of my people going back to the time of Henry VIII. I wonder if they were cunts too.
From a great man
"Vice and virtue are to the artist materials for an art"- The Picture of Dorian Gray, Oscar Wilde.
More food for thought.
Stuff and nonsense
What's the fuss, provided they're going to be eaten afterwards. I don't think I can understand it, though, if the people are vegetarian.
Cash shortages
My country is one of the richest in the world. We have enough to finance sports and stage the olympic games. We seem to have money for all sorts of grand and non-essential things. It is shameful that we can't spare just a little of that money to provide a decent level of mental healthcare.
Why bother?
I hate to be cynical, but the man is wasting his time and money. It's a bit like trying to teach a tiger not to bite.
Good news!!!
What a loss to us all (do I really mean that?)
Unsettled
The letter I received from the A S D centre has left me feeling a bit uncomfortable. It mentioned the words 'family' and 'childhood', and memories of some pretty awful experiences came flooding back, and show no sign of leaving me alone. Dear reader, if you were able to look inside my head and see what's going round in it, you'd want to pull the chain and flush it down the pan. Unfortunately I can't, as much as I wish I could. However despite all this maelstrom of unhappiness, cruelty and emotional excreta, I continue to stay positive. I know I'm not going under this time.
From a different perspective
All meat contains bacteria. It is dead after all, and liable to decompose. This story suggests to me that people do not know how to cook properly. If a chicken is cooked thoroughly on a medium setting, then all bacteria will be killed. It's not rocket science when you think about it.
A maxim
The medicine
The tablets I've been taking since Saturday seem to have settled down very quickly. I haven't had a drink since I started taking them, but I'm bloody well going to tonight.
More autistic stuff
Every Friday, regular as clockwork, the cunts go flying round and round and round in my thoughts. I couldn't care less whether I see them or not, but the horrible memories won't go away. I actually feel contaminated by knowing these individuals. I know I will be with friends tonight, and that will be much nicer. I'll try not to vomit when I see the other types. Cunts.
Just now
I've just made up a song-sheet with five new songs to add to my list from now on. Not bad; I've got about forty-five on the go.
A lovely surprise
I had an email from my friend who is family which really pleased me. My brother lives a long way from me, and this lady is not too far from him. She said she will collect me from my brother's so I can visit them. I'd be really happy to see them again.
My appointment
I've got the MRI scan this evening. I hope they'll do it, what with the metal plate and pins in my wrist. After that I'll need to dash home and change, ready for playing at the pub tonight.
A jolly chappy
When I got to the library, the gentleman with learning difficulties was already waiting. 'Mornin' Guv'nor' led into a really jolly monologue. Each phrase ended on an interrogative, which I gave up responding to, after what seemed a very long time. He's a really lovely bloke, but I really can't cope with all the loquaciousness, particularly in the morning. I had to turn away because tears started forming in my eyes.
Oh no
I saw another mouse last night, just as I thought I'd got rid of them. There's only one thing for it. I really don't like the idea one bit, but I'm going to lay some of those horrible, spiteful old-fashioned traps. I can't have the buggers running free.
This morning
I went for another early morning walk along the coast. That is a beautiful part of my life, and I will try to do this every day from now on. The day started off duller, damper and colder than yesterday, so there were no dogs around. I relished the peace and quiet. It started to brighten up as I walked back, and I saw one dog just as I hit town.
Sleep
It wasn't good again. I forced myself to stay awake until 10pm, but still had a restless night. I finally woke up around 5am, and got up at 5.30. Yawn. Winter mornings are very dark and uninspiring.
Last night
I had some of the salt beef I'd made, then finished the Lucy Moore book. It was very well written, authoritative, and highly enjoyable.
Thirty seconds of fame
It's his own fault. It seems that some people are prepared to do anything. What a sickening and unnecessary waste of life.
Rank stupidity
What is the matter with people? It's just sheer greed. Something for nothing.
Egg on face
Ha!!!!! An this bunch of clowns claims to be standing up for British culture? They haven't a clue.
Thursday 27 November 2014
High finance
It's high alright. It looks like they're going to shaft the world economy again.
Shortly ago
My friend and I had a lovely walk along the coast, looking at the sea, the wildfowl, looking for shells etc. The sea is beautiful, and we are so lucky to have it on our doorstep.
Indeed????
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-india-30221820
Women's rights again, or rather, lack of them. Two girls found strung up after complaining of gang-rape. So they hanged themselves did they? How very convenient. It stinks.
Health
Since I gave up the fags, by lungs have started getting rid of the tar that had settled there over decades. Also I'm breathing easily through my nose, and that's a new experience. I don't ever want to go back to tobacco, but I don't mind if I stay on the electric fags.
The downside is that when I go out, I can smell all the petrol and exhaust fumes from motor vehicles. That's very unpleasant.
The downside is that when I go out, I can smell all the petrol and exhaust fumes from motor vehicles. That's very unpleasant.
Now
A question
Why should the Pope stick up for women's rights and same-sex marriages? The Pope is a Catholic, and that's not what Catholics believe in. That's one reason I think that particular church is a cunt.
Enough
This cycle of violence needs to be addressed. Come in USA. PLEASE ban weapons.
Occupational hazard
It's sad for his loved ones.
So what?
It's his own fault. I wonder how much public money it cost to rescue him.
Surprise, surprise (well not really)
And another fat little maggot comes out of the woodwork.
Unexpected
I love this post. Eire is a predominantly Catholic country. In fact it is easy to think that all the citizens of that country share the same religion. However there was once a thriving Jewish community in Dublin, but I don't know whether there still is. It's refreshing to know that Atheism also has a voice there.
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