Wednesday 31 December 2014
Soon
It'll be time to go home. I need to go to the supermarket for a couple of bits I forgot earlier. Then I'll take it from there.
Tonight
I was going to cook something from scratch, but I can't be bothered. I'll have sausage and bacon with some frozen chips. That'll sort me out.
Groan
The mouthy, slutty little chavettes are back. Why do they always have to come and sit near me? It ain't fair.
Edith Piaf; Celui qui ne savait pas pleurer
I can't listen to this, so don't know what the words are. I used to cry a lot, but seem to have forgotten how to.
The party
Some close friends of mine are having a party on Saturday, to celebrate one year of living in this town. They have asked me to make some Indian snacks. I'll make them on Friday, as I'll be playing all afternoon on Saturday.
Advertising
Now
I'm in one of those states where I can't rightly describe how I'm feeling. My arms and legs feel prickly. My mood feels like water swilling down a plug-hole. I hope it'll soon pass.
The other place
This morning I replied to the mean landlady, that is the one who cost me money. I said that I was busy in January, therefore couldn't play there. She has written back asking if I could do February. I'll reply to her after the weekend. By then, hopefully, I will have got my head together. I'm still holding out hope about the little pub in the town centre, who said they were interested.
Just now
I went to see my friend from France. Unfortunately he was sitting inside because of the cold weather, and I didn't feel at all comfortable about going in.
I stood by the cafe, and caught up with him very briefly when he came to order some more food. He must have thought me very rude when I declined both food and a coffee. I feel very disappointed about it, and will write to him properly to apologise, once my mood has settled down.
A thing of beauty
Soon
A friend of mine is over from France, and will be at my other friends' cafe at lunchtime. I'm feeling very apprehensive about going over there, as some of the cunts are likely to be around. I'll contact my friend in the cafe in a minute, to find out who is around, and I'll take it from there.
Earlier on
I paid an early visit to the supermarket, before all the tractors, sticks and wheely walkers turn up. That was good thinking on my part, as the cold weather would have kept them at home for a bit. I'm glad I missed the last-minute crowds.
A bit of detection
Understandable
http://www.nytimes.com/2014/12/31/world/middleeast/resolution-for-palestinian-state-fails-in-security-council.html
This is a sad reflection on international diplomacy. I don't favour one country over another, but I can see why this decision was reached. Perhaps if the country that was defeated stopped attacking the country that won, the outcome might have been different. It's very sad, and ordinary people continue to suffer.
This is a sad reflection on international diplomacy. I don't favour one country over another, but I can see why this decision was reached. Perhaps if the country that was defeated stopped attacking the country that won, the outcome might have been different. It's very sad, and ordinary people continue to suffer.
My year
It's certainly been interesting. Emotionally it's been quite horrible, but so have all my other years. There have been more peaks and troughs than usual. My years are usually mostly troughs.
The good thing about the year is that it's provided answers to some of the problems that have blighted my life. I have learned that my 'strangeness' is in fact autism, and that my depression, fits and tingling arm are caused by a cyst on the brain, rather than being psychosomatic.
The other thing I have learned (rather re-learned) is to be wary of people. I started believing it when someone told me that this person or that person is nice, and have got stung a few times as a result. In future I'm going to do what I always did before I moved here; I will avoid all unnecessary social contact (except with my close people), and trust my own gut instincts. If I do go out to socialise, it will have to be somewhere that I find comfortable. Am I being selfish? This is what I ask myself.
The good thing about the year is that it's provided answers to some of the problems that have blighted my life. I have learned that my 'strangeness' is in fact autism, and that my depression, fits and tingling arm are caused by a cyst on the brain, rather than being psychosomatic.
The other thing I have learned (rather re-learned) is to be wary of people. I started believing it when someone told me that this person or that person is nice, and have got stung a few times as a result. In future I'm going to do what I always did before I moved here; I will avoid all unnecessary social contact (except with my close people), and trust my own gut instincts. If I do go out to socialise, it will have to be somewhere that I find comfortable. Am I being selfish? This is what I ask myself.
A bit of silliness
I just took this 'test', and it came up with the result that I had an affair with Mozart. Interesting and funny.
Weather
It's bright and sunny, but bitterly cold. It isn't so windy as it has been lately. It does feel colder than the three degrees shown in the weather forecast, I can tell you.
Gone fishing?
Now
My mood is not brilliant. I think a couple of fags will sort me out, when I have them shortly. My mind is going round like the clappers, and it makes me tired.
New Year's Eve
I can't see me staying up tonight. I plan to have a quiet night and go to bed as soon as I'm ready.
Sleep
I had a shocking bad night. I spent the whole night turning round, with intermittent short naps. I was tangled up in the bedding when I woke up for the last time, and feel like I've been on a frog-march. It's all very trying.
Last night
I watched Pool of London (1951) starring Bonar Colleano, Alfie Bass, Joan Dowling, Moira Lister and others. Afterwards I read some more of the Tim Hitchcock book, and finished with a couple of episodes of a genealogy program. One well-known 'personality' really got on my nerves. All he wanted to know was 'What happened to the money?' Very uninspiring indeed. I went to bed with the right hump.
Tuesday 30 December 2014
Incontravertable
Stupid people are loud. They are, and it's a fact. It can't be all in my imagination, because I haven't got one. That's how I know.
Set in one's ways
I can't be bothered to cook tonight. Instead I will carry out the Trooping of the Freezer ceremony. In other words, I'll defrost something I've already cooked, probably curry (again).
Air safety
It doesn't look too good for Air Asia. After the two recent and appalling incidents, it was reported today that one of their planes has overshot the runway at an airoprt in the Philippines. How many people will be killed before this airline is grounded? Does it take passenger safety with the seriousness it deserves?
Lucky
I haven't got a TV aerial, therefore don't watch the telly. I've just remembered all the miscellaneous shit the broadcast every New Year's Eve, and remembered also that I shan't be able to watch it. Aren't I lucky!!!
A feeling
I think i will need to go home soon, that is before I explode and lose it with these three annoying bitches. They really don't know how to behave, but I don't know how to tell them. They all want a fucking good slap.
A sound economist?
How the mighty have fallen.
Morons
Two chavettes are whizzing round the floor on computer chairs and crashing into each other. They seem to find this very funny, although I can't see why for the life of me. It's frightening to think that in a year or two, they'll probably be up the duff, and a further nuisance to the rest of us.
Tonight
It'll be another quiet one at home. I don't feel like doing anything tomorrow either, so I expect I'll stay at home.
The time of year
I watch the sunrise every morning, and have noticed a very slight, even subtle difference. It's started to occur a few minutes earlier than a week ago. Lovely. But I haven't noticed any difference with the sunsets yet. I long for the brightness.
Earlier on
I received a follow-up email from the woman in the next town. (I played twice at her pub at great expense to myself. I found her very mean). I have no intention of playing there ever again, and will reply to her tomorrow (politely, of course).
Now
Three loud, scabby chavettes in front of where I'm writing. Dog barking downstairs. I don't know which of the two is worst.
Family history
I've been doing a bit of digging. My Grandmother, well not very nice. Her mother was a lovely woman, I am told, but she died young, some years before I was born. Her father was, apparently, not a nice man. I know nothing of the latter's father, but have discovered that he went inside for three months in 1889. This person's father also did time in 1837, and was apparently robbed in a pub while drunk in 1839. It don't look too good, eh? I think I may be right about the 'cunt' tendency going back a long way in that part of the family. Cunts.
Finally!!!
The penny dropped. I finally worked out how to download facebook videos, so have made up a disk. There are no microphones here, so I'll play it at home. If it's all ok, I'll take some copies tomorrow.
Tempus fugit
The new year begins on Thursday. I hope it will be a good one for everyone that matters to me. I also hope it will be kind to me too.
This week
Tomorrow morning I expect to see a friend of mine who is over from France. On Thursday my young friend and I will go for our weekly walk.
The weather
It;s bloody cold today. It's nice and bright today, but I can see that it has been raining. I'm in a very warm library, but am shivering.
Now
I'm feeling a bit low. My mood is tired and edgy. I didn't sleep very well at all last night, and I don't suppose that helps. I've got more than usual going through my mind, and that's also very tiring.
Stumped
New technology has never been one of my strong points. I'm no good at working it out for myself, but am fine once I've been shown what to do. This morning I've been trying to burn youtube and facebook videos onto a disk, so that I can circulate it to local businesses, in the hope of booking some gigs. I've wasted about two hours on it. I'll have to see if I can find someone to ask how to do it.
Last night
I watched The London Nobody Knows (1969), with James Mason, and The Small World of Sammy Lee (1963), starring Anthony Newley, Warren Mitchell, Miriam Karlin and Roy Kinnear. The former is offbeat, and the latter depressing. They matched my mood.
Monday 29 December 2014
Tonight
I'm having a quiet one at home again. The nerves feel a bit battered, but I'm hoping I'll be able to unwind a bit. Tomorrow is another day, as an old friend always tells me.
Just now
Lessons went spectacularly well, as usual. I don't know who enjoys them most, me or my victim!
Air safety
Is there any such thing? This news comes in the wake of the Indonesian aeroplane disaster. I'm frightened of flying now, where I didn't used to be.
Cruelty to animals
A Mexican bullfighter has been gored by the animal she was tormenting. Good for the bull. Serves her right.
Neurologist
I'm waiting to hear from the neurologist. We're in the middle of the Christmas/New Year period, and this is bound to delay things. I do want to get this stuff over and done with, and it's always on my mind.
Photos
I never used to take photos. I've owned cameras on an off, but never hardly used them. Now it's quite the opposite. I take my camera with me wherever I go, and photograph anything I feel like. I take lots of photos. My usual subjects are the sea, the sky, old buildings, wild flowers and wildfowl. I spend most of my life entirely on my own. My photos show what I have seen. They are a way of recording my experiences. They are a record of a life that would otherwise be unremembered.
On Saturday
The historic building where I played recently has been closed for its Christmas/New Year break. I will be playing again when it reopens on Saturday.
Now
The computer chairs are all on casters. Someone is allowing their brat to perambulate itself around the room on one. Incredible.
More A S D
I think outside the box. Always have done. I'm deliberately trying to think 'confidence'. Just now I felt a glimmer of optimism, but it disappeared as quickly as it came. But at least it did come.
A S D stuff
I've got my last counselling session tomorrow. The counsellor's father is very ill, and she's going home to look after him. If I were her I'd do exactly the same (if I had a decent father that is, or any father at all for that matter). I am going to miss the sessions, as I found them really helpful.
At what cost?
A teenager has been killed by a shark, while fishing. It's not the shark's fault. It was only being a shark. Who gave the child permission to do something so dangerous?
A realisation
I have realised that what little confidence I managed to keep hold of, has completely flown out of the window. Back to square one. I know I will come through. How long it takes, though, is the question.
Out of the blue
Earlier on I received an email from the pub landlady in the other town, asking me if I will play next month. That place has already cost me a lot of money, and I have no intention of going back there.
Update
Fat kid back with hot chocolate and two packets of crisps. A responsible adult needs to sort this one out.
Weather
It has got noticeably colder over the past few days. This morning I put my heater on for the first time ever, so I could get dressed in the warm. I don't like heating as a rule, but really needed it this morning.
News
There are two sad stories in today's news. Firstly another Indonesian aeroplane is lying at the bottom of the sea. Secondly another passenger ship is on fire in the Adriatic. History does repeat itself, unfortunately.
Again
Slobs are back. Fat kid chomping on choc ice. All calling across the room to each other. Luckily I remembered ear plugs this time.
People
I'm really tired of them. I need to find work, but want to find something that brings me into minimal contact with people. Ideally no contact at all. I wonder what's out there.
Yesterday
I went for a walk after lunch. I managed a few miles before I turned back. I'd intended to go further, but I had a strong, bitterly-cold wind blowing in my face. Later on I went back out to take some photos of the gorgeous sunset.
Last night
I watched Murder Ahoy (1964) starring Margaret Rutherford and Lionel Jeffries, and Heavens Above (1964), starring Peter Sellers, Lionel Jeffries, Irene Handl, Eric Sykes, Miriam Karlin and others. I enjoyed both.
Saturday night
I watched Murder Most Foul (1964) starring Margaret Rutherford, and I'm Alright Jack (1959) starring Peter Sellars. Margaret Rutherford, Irene Handl, Lionel Jeffries, John le Mesurier, Liz Fraser and others. I enjoyed a bottle of wine I'd been given for Christmas. I enjoyed the night.
Conundrum
I do hate mixed messages. I have enough difficulty in the first place, trying to work out what people mean. I wish that some people would just try being honest, for a change.
Saturday 27 December 2014
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaagh
The mouthy idiots have taken over the library. I'd assumed they would have made the same mistake I did at first, by staying at home thinking the place was closed. I didn't think to bring my earplugs today. Crap.
'Cheated out of my life'
So reads the headlines. The man hasn't been cheated out of anything, as far as I can see. He didn't have any right to stay here in the first place. Another Christmas sob story.
Happy thoughts
I just sensed a glimmer of happiness as I thought about the tv. Thinking of all the rubbish I'm going to miss has cheered me up.
Earlier
I went home via the supermarket and picked up some good bargains. Afterwards I went up to the clifftops, braved the ferocious gale, and took some videos of a very wild sea. My hands went bright red and numb with the cold.
Shortly
I'll have a wander home via the supermarket, and then check out the seafront. Apart from that it'll be a quiet one, cooking, laundry, reading and films.
Christmas
I had a really lovely one this year. It was just how I would have wanted it to be. No fuss, no commotion, closeness and distance both at hand, and not a cunt in sight. Lovely!
Man's best friend
The usual spate of stories has begun about dogs being given as christmas presents, to people who don't want them. The headline to this story is 'Can you help find this dog a home?' I'm afraid my answer is 'no, I can't'.
I'm actually much more concerned about the eighty-three year old woman who got mugged.
Food
For the past two days I've eaten much more than usual. The trouble is that now I feel hungry all the time. I can't be hungry, so I'm trying to resist the urge to eat. If I carry on eating at the rate I have been, I'll be a fat bastard in a very short space of time.
Sick
I am outraged by the story of an eighty-three year old woman who was mugged on Christmas Day. Surely the day is immaterial. The saddest part of the story is that it happened at all. Very upsetting.
More weather
I hope it doesn't improve too much before the high tide that's expected after three o'clock. I want to take a video of huge waves crashing over the harbour first.
Weather update
The wind has eased off considerably, but we've now got heavy and persistent drizzle. I don't envy a friend of mine, who is currently on the ferry in the English Channel, on his way from France.
Earlier on
I braved the weather this morning, and went to my friends to use their computer. I didn't stay long though, because I hadn't realised they had a guest with them. I walked back via the library. to find that it is open as normal today. So here I am..
This afternoon
Now that the weather has turned colder, I'm going to cook a meat pudding. I don't make them very often, as they take about four hours to cook. It really sticks to the sides and gives one energy.
Hypocrite
If Turkey has the freest press in the world, then pigs can fly.
The weather
The wind picked up during the course of the evening, and it's been blowing a gale since last night. I kept getting woken up by bangs and crashes, shattering glass, and things being blown down the street. I went out this morning and nearly got blown over a few times. It's still nasty out there.
Last night
After dinner I watched Blanche Fury (1948), a melodrama starring Stewart Granger and Valerie Hobson. I then read a bit more of the book by Tim Hitchcock, before watching The Titfield Thunderbolt (1953), one of my favourite Ealing comedies. I finished with an episode of a genealogy series. The person who was the subject of this programme really annoyed me, and I went to bed with the hump.
What a surprise (I don't think)
So the Tories want to legalise fox hunting. It's just another example of that lot safeguarding the interests of the privileged classes. I can't think of any justification for killing animals just for the sake of it. I do not understand how it can be classified as sport.
Packs of hounds could be deployed much more constructively, by substituting 'Tory MP' for 'fox', and chasing and persecuting them across the open countryside. The cunts.
Friday 26 December 2014
Why?
This story really upset me when I read it. I don't know why someone would want to do this to some of society's most vulnerable people, and how they can live with themself afterwards.
Coughs and sneezes
Is this news? Well it isn't news to me. What will they report next? Haemorroids, Atghlete's Foot, Flatulence? I ask you.
Prime time viewing
Even if I had a telly, I'd probably still not have watched this.
This morning
The sky is much greyer than yesterday and the wind has disappeared. However it still remains cold and damp. I started the day with a fried breakfast, then took myself on a long coastal walk to burn it off. The area where I live is stunningly beautiful.
I saw nesting Fulmar
and marigolds in bloom
What a civilised way to start one's day.
During the night
I think I had one of my 'funny turns' last night when I went to the loo. Either that or I dreamed it, but it feels like the former. I really am getting boring.
Over-indulgence
I started feeling peckish at about 8pm. Goodness knows why, as I had already eaten far too much. I had a bit of blue cheese and my home-made chutney, a bit of shortbread and some turron.
Last night
I walked back from my friends' just after 6pm. Well, rather, I plodded. I was so crammed full of good food I couldn't do much more.
When I got home I lolloped on the sofa with a nice glass of wine, and read a bit more of Tim Hitchcock's Down and out in eighteenth-century London. Then I watched an excellent BBC dramatisation of A Christmas Carol with Michael Hordern, John le Mesurier and June Brown. Afterwards I finished with one of my favourite comedies; The Wrong Arm of the Law (1963) with Peter Sellers, Bernard Cribbins, Lionel Jeffries, John le Mesurier and Nanette Newman.
When I got home I lolloped on the sofa with a nice glass of wine, and read a bit more of Tim Hitchcock's Down and out in eighteenth-century London. Then I watched an excellent BBC dramatisation of A Christmas Carol with Michael Hordern, John le Mesurier and June Brown. Afterwards I finished with one of my favourite comedies; The Wrong Arm of the Law (1963) with Peter Sellers, Bernard Cribbins, Lionel Jeffries, John le Mesurier and Nanette Newman.
Thursday 25 December 2014
The news
The news is particularly horrible lately. All tales of gloom and doom and unimaginable suffering. As usual the great and good put a gloss of superficial goodness for the day. As usual, everything will continue just as normal in the morning. It's so sad.
Over-indulgence
I do feel stuffed. I think I must have eaten in one afternoon what I'd usually est in two days. I'd quite forgotten this feeling, and must confess that I don't mind at all.
Tonight
I'll stay indoors tonight, and am likely to watch more of my old films. The pub landlord emailed me and said he'd like it if I go there tonight. That's really kind of him but I don't think I can do that. Some people will be there that make me want to vomit.
Weather alert
Four inches of snow have been forecast for the near future. All I can say is that if they think four inches is a lot, then they've had a sheltered life.
Christmas
I went to family (close friends who have become family) this morning, and it was lovely to see them. In fact it's always lovely to see them. Afterwards I went to other close friends for an excellent dinner, and here I still am. It's wonderful being with other people who are autistic. I'm sat on my own in the front room while they play dominoes in the kitchen. I'm having a great time and so are they. No fuss or commotion. It's so easy for me to cope with. Lovely. I wouldn't generally bother doing anything for Christmas.
This morning
I woke up at 5am today and got up half an hour later. I went for an early walk in the cold wind and thoroughly enjoyed the early-morning brightness. Look at what I saw:
Aren't I lucky!
Last night
I watched Time Gentleman, Please (1952) starring Sid James, Dora Bryan and others, and enjoyed its innocent humour. Then I started watching Orders Are Orders (1954) which really annoyed me. Sid James has no idea of other accents. Even his 'cockney' is riddled with 'Johannesburg'. He's good at what he can do, but not at anything else.
Wednesday 24 December 2014
Sickening
People of that faith always bang on about how they live under strict laws of sexual propriety, and that it's only us lot in Western society who can't keep our flies shut. It must be my fault for misunderstanding what I see. I'm the one who is wrong. Of course women are not dominated by men in that culture, are they? They are not stoned to death for adultery, are they? They are not punished for dressing in something other than their traditional dress, are they? No, of course not. It must be because I don't understand. I certainly don't understand the way women and minorities are treated. Fucking hypocrites they are, the lot of them.
Is this really news?
Very sad for Bryan Ferry, but I don't know him or his son. Are they reporting this instead of something more important?
Just now
I took myself down to the supermarket, to join the pack of human scavengers who were already picking the place clean. The shop was a slough of human decrepitude. I nearly lost it twice, when people suddenly started fumbling with their mobiles and blocking the aisles. I got some good meat at a reduced price, but my nerves took a battering.
Disgusting
http://wellbehavedmormonwoman.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/movie-frozen-gay-homosexual-agenda.html?m=1
Well behaved woman? The truth is she's a menace to society.
Well behaved woman? The truth is she's a menace to society.
Life with A S D
Christmas can be really overwhelming. Here is some useful advice for coping with it.
Later on
I cooked plenty last night, so shan't have to cook later on. I'll need to boil a sausepan of rice, but that's not really cooking. I'll tidy up the front room and do the washing up. Apart from that I'm going to take it easy and give my nerves a rest.
Invitations
I've just had my second invitation from friends to meet in the place I used to patronise. I want to tell people that I don't go there anymore, but don't tell them. I don't want to have to go into why. So I do the usual and just say that I'm busy. One of these days I think I probably will have my say.
Strange news
This is a horrible story. Wouldn't it surely be easier to walk away from someone than to kill them? And why did he have to do what he did next? I don't understand.
Now
The library is strangely quiet. I have three theories:
1) People are picking supermarket shelves dry.
2) People are at home watching TV 'extravaganzas'.
3) People are doing both the above.
1) People are picking supermarket shelves dry.
2) People are at home watching TV 'extravaganzas'.
3) People are doing both the above.
During the night
Upstairs was a bit lively. I could hear upstairs' records. From my flat, the noise was a bit like a washing machine going round, but with more bass line. This morning the records were still playing. I stuck the ear plugs in before I went to bed, so wasn't bothered by it during the night. Without the earplugs I wouldn't have been able to sleep.
Yesterday afternoon
One of my neighbours has a 'retro' shop just round the corner from where I live. Yesterday he called me inside, and invited me to the Old Town's new year bash at a local nightclub. That was really nice of him to ask me, but I had to turn down the offer. I'd never survive the noise and the crowd.
This afternoon
My young friend and I will have our walk today instead of tomorrow. However if his cough hasn't improved, we shan't go if it's still raining.
Weather
It's stayed mild today, but yesterday's brightness has been replaced by dark clouds and drizzle. Never mind. We don't usually have thick snow and robins at Christmas.
Sleep
I thought I slept peacefully last night. My bedding was all over the place when I woke up. Some of it was on the floor. That tells a different story.
Last night
My mood was a bit odd, and I'm afraid I erred by cracking open a bottle of wine. I'm not really used to it any more, and am feeling the effects this morning.
Last night's viewing
I started off with two Laurel and Hardy films: Twice Two and Brats. Afterwards I watched the beginning of Hitchcock's The man who knew too much (1934), but I got bored and went for a walk. I finished off with Two way stretch, starring Peter Sellers, Bernard Cribbins, Irene Handl, Wilfred Hyde-White and Lionel Jeffries. Very enjoyable.
In his prime
The poor man, and he's only ninety. I don't give a stuff.
Tuesday 23 December 2014
One person
OK I'll come clean about what's bothering me. One person who befriended me, I believe, in order to have easy access to certain people and a certain place, is back in town. I had experienced some very uninspiring behaviour and broke off contact. I have learned that he behaved very badly in that certain place and is no longer welcome there. As we used to say What goes around comes around.
Moods
I'm feeling low again, yet something inside me is trying to hold onto the optimism. It's a funny old world, only it doesn't really make me laugh at the moment. In among all the nice people and nice things in this town, I am aware of people who are more akin to some of the more unpleasant of Dickens' characters. I'm not talking about money. What I mean is how one person is prepared to treat another.
Shopping
The charity shops were a waste of time this morning. There was nothing there for me. The silly season has already begun. When I got to the supermarket, people were buying stupid quantities of everything, as if the town were about to come under siege.
A picture of health
A ginormously vast woman, who was wheezing, puffing and panting, came plodding up the stairs and plonked herself in the corner. (I think I know why fat people gravitate towards the corner. They lean against the wall, thereby relieving themselves of the effort of sitting up unaided). She's got the most hideous, productive cough, and has coughing fits every few minutes. Gross.
Soon
It'll be time for another walk, this time to the supermarket, to get dinner for tonight and tomorrow. I don't really feel like doing much else. My mind is too busy. I can see me coming back to the library computers afterwards, possibly. I don't want to go home just yet, as I'll be there all evening and night.
Blatant discrimination
If same-sex couples can enter into a civil partnerships, why aren't heterosexual couples allowed to do the same? I agree with these guys, and hope they win their case.
Doggies
So what if Jumbones make dogs ill. If I'd realised that I'd have bought a crate of them years ago, and fed them to every pooch that passed by.
Christmas
I've got a full day on Thursday. In the morning I'm going to see my friend from uni's brother and the latter's partner. Afterwards I'm going to friends for dinner, a natter, a game of mousetrap, and whatever else may or may not happen. I'm starting to look forward to it now.
Tonight
I'm going to have a quiet one again, again. But that suits me fine. I really appreciate the relative peace and quiet. I can lay back on the sofa and read or watch a film, and not have to listen to someone else's pile of shit. I can think (and worry) without any botheration or distraction. If I do go out, it will be to see the people I want to be with, and not to be stuck in the vicinity of people I can't bear the sight of.
Just now
While I was on my travels, I passed a pet shop. They gad a sign advertising 'Reptile products 20% off'. I wonder if that includes such things as suitcases and shoes.
This morning
When I got to the doctors this morning, just before opening time, the queue reminded me of this painting.
A question
Why do people insist on saying that they have the flu, when in fact they have a cold? People really are such drama queens. Colds aren't very nice, but the flu is in a different order of suffering. Flu can be fatal. I've had the flu before, and I can assure you I wasn't even able to stay awake while I had it. I wish people wouldn't exaggerate like this.
A S D and mobility
I have decided to apply for a buss pass. I know I haven't had a full diagnosis, but I know that I am autistic. This is why I've never wanted to, or had the confidence to drive. I believe I am entitled to a buss pass, and shall apply for one once Christmas is over. Freedom of movement will greatly improve my quality of life. At the moment I am restricted to places within walking distance, unless the journey is absolutely necessary.
Shortly
It will be time for a bite to eat and a trawl of the charity shops. I'm still on the lookout for flat caps. They're so comfortable, and so much the better when they only cost £1.00.
Ghastly
A ginormous kid is sitting in the corner scoffing a huge bag of crisps, and guzzling his second tin of fizzy drinks. I wonder how he got that fat?
Optimism
I'm pleasantly surprised. When I went out for a fag just now, there was warm sunshine. Not bad for this time of year, eh?
We've just turned the corner of the shortest day of the year, so we will have increasing hours of daylight until June.
My diagnosis has left me feeling much calmer, knowing that after a small operation, the quality of my life is likely to improve. It's nice to have something to look forward to.
We've just turned the corner of the shortest day of the year, so we will have increasing hours of daylight until June.
My diagnosis has left me feeling much calmer, knowing that after a small operation, the quality of my life is likely to improve. It's nice to have something to look forward to.
An A S D thing
I cannot cope with noise. And I mean it. It does my fucking head in. I get irritated and angry. There's one cunt who comes to the library just to talk loudly on his mobile. I can still hear him with the earplugs in. It shouldn't be allowed.
Reading
Yesterday I had another look at Down and out in eighteenth-century London by Tim Hitchcock. It's a fascinating read, and very well researched. I overlook the one paragraph where the word beggar is repeatedly spelled begger.
Going back in time, my own ancestors come from this sort of background. I wonder if they were already cunts back then. By extension I wonder if the poor people in Hitchcock's book were cunts too.
Going back in time, my own ancestors come from this sort of background. I wonder if they were already cunts back then. By extension I wonder if the poor people in Hitchcock's book were cunts too.
Ornithology
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