A public nuisance

When I left home this morning I noticed that something was strange and different. The town seemed to be suffering a terrible infestation of midgets. It was appalling. I'm tall and have long legs, and everywhere I turned they kept getting under my feet. They seemed to all make a beeline for the space immediately in front of me. I felt as if I was walking round in shackles. They were just too close, the cunts.