People

I've just been to bed for an hour and a half, and managed to sleep for an hour of it. I've been thinking about people. First there are the people I love, that is my family and closest friends. They are the ones who really matter to me, and the ones I think of constantly. Then there are my social friends, who I think of sometimes but don't have such a deep feeling for as the others. Then there are people I don't know, and I am indifferent to them. Then there is my biological family. Except for my one brother I dislike them passionately. Then there are the social irritants, whose behaviour I have issues with.
And then there's myself. There are things I am much more comfortable with than before. I do not like my own company. I am not the person I would like to be. I am no longer ashamed of who I am, although I still get embarrassed when I misunderstand what has been said. I am frustrated by my inability to make my intellect achieve for me. I am proud of the people who are closest to me, and proud that they love me. I am afraid of looking stupid in front of others. I am a very private person, hence the anonymity of my blog, and am upset by too close contact with people I don't know or don't feel comfortable with. I now accept that my musical abilities are not mediocre.
I think the latest sleep has done me some good.