One man and his dog

I didn't mention earlier that there was another of the perennial and annoying cunts at the pub last night. I know I have my own issues with Aspergers, but this cunt is completely up the pole. He doesn't usually talk much, but when he does it's weird. Yesterday he had his laptop with him and was showing people footage of plane crashes, accompanied by his own running commentary. How fucking strange is that. I did say that people might rather watch the Wizard of Oz, but he didn't answer. He mentioned again that he's fluent in every language ever spoken by man. I've heard him speak three or four words in German quite fluently, and two of those were not very nice ones. The thing is, he doesn't really have anything to say in English, never mind any other language.
Later on he started gushing on about the time he worked with monkeys, and I got the giggles. It was probably the other way round; the monkeys were supervising him. And then there was the tale of how he was trying to sedate a vicious monkey, but ended up injecting himself instead. I'm afraid I couldn't contain myself and burst out laughing. I don't know what planet this geezer lives on.
He has an equally strange dog. I don't know what it is, but it's one of those stocky-looking things with a round bony head and huge jaw. Don't laugh, the fucking thing is called Minnie. It makes the most hideous whining and wheezing noises. All the fucking time. One day the cunt had it on a long lead in the pub, and it wheezed its way over to a customer. He patted and stroked it, and the next thing, it had its jaws round the man's arm. The cunt told the man quite calmly that it was only playing. It's about time the revolting, ugly bitch was put down.
Of a;ll the pubs in the world, why do these cunts have to pick on ours? Despite the fact I love our pub so much, I feel it will soon be time to rename it as per the following picture.