Ein selbstzerstörender Geist

Täglich versuche Ich in einem Gedenkensmeer nicht zu ertrinken. Auch wann Ich Mich freue, doch ängstige Ich Mich über Etwas. Möglicherweise muβ Ich Mich über Etwas ängstigen. Sowie ist Mein Leben. Heute, zum Beispiel, bin Ich sehr fröhlich, doch habe Ich Angst. Es macht Mich sehr müde. Mein Gehirn denkt und denkt und denkt ohne  Pause. Mit Mir lebe Ich kaum in frieden. Mein Gehirn braucht einen Tag frei zu nehmen.

Angst

Mein Geist ist voller Angst. Ich fühle nervös. Mein Freund hat sein erstes Buch geschrieben, und Heute ist es neu erschienen. Ich habe seine Post auf meinem Facebookwand gezeigt. Ich habe Stolz an Meinem Freund, da für ihn ist das schon so eine Leistung. Die Sache ist daβ er Christlich ist, und Ich bin Nichtglauber. Das Buch ist über christliche Sachen. Mein Geist kämpft sich. Ich frage Mich, wenn meine Gedenke etwas mit Aspergers zu tun haben, da Ich bin immer so analytisch? Dieser wirre Gedankenwust.

Twenty-first century sanitation

Our pub is tiny and doesn't have room for a loo, so we use the public lavatories next door. They are in a deplorable state. They won't be for much longer though. My brother and I are going to paint them later.

A touch of class

There is a vintage car show taking place today. I will play at the pub later, as we expect it to be busy. The weather is much better than yesterday, although not very warm.

A leech

Our shared delusion of peace was shattered by the arrival of the cunt later in the evening. As usual he latched onto my brother faster than a fly to a turd. I could see my brother becoming increasingly uncomfortable so spent the rest of the evening trying to extricate him. The only thing is, whenever I did that, the cunt would go straight for my brother's partner. I hit upon a solution by calling her over to our table. Then my friend from uni's mum called my brother over on a pretext. A result! Then the cunt pestered some other people who rapidly acquired glazed expressions and left shortly afterwards. Surely I shouldn't have to spend so much of my time stopping that leech from upsetting those close to me?

More Aspergers

Some new visitors to the pub called me aside, and said extremely king things about my playing. I felt very uncomfortable and looked down. I could feel my eyes starting to well up, and a lump coming to my throat. I thanked them for what they had said, and then got myself away very quickly. I didn't want to make a fool of myself.

Last night

When I entered the pub I went straight to the keyboard. People enjoyed the pieces  played and joined in with the songs. Some of the morris dancers who I watched earlier were present, and I got talking to them. My friend from uni's mum and her husband were here, and I spent most of the night with them. I played a few more times during the evening, whenever people asked me to. Some of my friends were there, as well as an elderly couple who were on holiday and had chatted with me the day before. It was mostly a nice evening.