Thinking

I am not very good at reacting to sad news. I never know what to say, so usually end up saying nothing at the time the news is broken. This leads people to think I am insensitive and cold. That really isn't the case. I cannot easily find the right words to express how I am feeling. When I think about it, it takes some time for the news to register. And then I can't rightly describe how I feel. I don't know how to describe it.
I cannot find words of comfort. 'Sorry' seems such a shallow word, when it can be used to excuse a person from such things as spilling a glass of water, assaulting someone or worse. There is a type of sadness for which there are no words to describe, and for which there are no words of comfort. The right words just don't exist.

Yesterday

I worked hard yesterday. I have two linoleum floors and they were in dire need of a thorough going over. They were treated to two steam cleans, a mopping and a polishing. In between each course they were allowed to dry and then swept. Good job done. My hands and arms are aching, but it's a good job done.
At the same time I listened to Bartok's viola concerto, and concerti for one and two harpsichords by W.F. Bach. Dinner was something (pre-cooked) from the freezer. Bed at ten.
The people upstairs were particularly awful. The brat threw one tantrum after another. Then all the kids were screaming out of the window, and banging with something metallic on the outside iron railings on the balcony. Bastards.

A thought

This of course does apply when it comes to the population at large. However it does not apply when it comes to the people I am closest to. I know and trust them, and can therefore know that a last minute cancellation doesn't arise out of thoughtlessness. Those people know me and would never take such a cancellation lightly. The world at large is a different matter. I don't know those people, and from past experience there is a strong probability of lack of consideration or other ulterior motives.

The news

It really is depressing. Never mind all the real issues in the world, we read daily what we've always known; the great and the good are neither as great nor as good as they pretend to be. Meanwhile the state media presents a very glossy shine on at least one of the Tory party leadership contenders. Whiter that white eh? I don't think so.

Today

I'm going to have a quiet day. Apart from a meeting at half past two, I expect I'll stay indoors all day. There is always the possibility that I might come back to the library, but at the moment I don't think so.

The rest of yesterday

It was all pretty much as usual, except that I watched a couple of episodes of Dads Army and part of Mr Turner. I listened to disk 45 of the Bach cantatas, and some orchestral stuff by Malcolm Arnold. The people upstairs was a cunt.

Since earlier

I went for the bus ride but didn't stay at my destination for very long. It was too crowded and noisy so I turned round and came back. I'll be off home in a moment. It'll be an ordinary evening followed by an ordinary dinner.